This makes me smile.

It's sober time!

Seriously, too many birthdays, too many celebrations... It's funny, even though we're not in school, summer has a tendency to bring out the crazy. What is it about the summer that makes people feel like they should be a little crazier than usual? I'm sure we're not the only ones.

So, at 6:30 this morning I decided sober time starts now. At least until this weekend. We are going to clean, read, cook, garden... We're going to be wholesome for a couple days. Well at least that's the plan.

In case that was a dissappointment and you would rather another crazy story, how's this: Yesterday was T's actual birthday. By 7:30pm there were four of us helping her walk, sheltering her puking efforts, and stuffing her into B's car. Damn shots! This girl is not accustomed to being force-fed shots. It was not a pretty sight. BUT, since she got to bed by 8:00pm she had NO problem getting to work ontime. So I guess that's a bonus?

We, however, chose to continue celebrating her birthday. And I can't tell you much about that... because... I just can't... But I know we went to the Fastest Bartender Competition. And I know we all walked home. I'm pretty sure I was holding someone's hand to make sure I could walk straight. So.... if anyone has anymore details on last night that would be awesome.

What I thought would be a terrible Father's Day Weekend.....

Some quick past history: My dad passed away suddenly 6 months before I turned 21. It devestated me. I don't think I will ever get over it. Therefore, Father's Day Weekend, which falls 2 weeks after my daddy's bday every year, is one of my least favorite weekends. This Father's Day weekend I had two plans: Saturday - go to the Nat's game w/B-Rock on a bus from Hard Times & get shitty wasted, & Sunday (Father's Day): work for a few hours, do laundry, and cry myself into a drunken mess for one day, while still reminscing on all of the fond memories of my dad. That's not exactly how my weekend went at all....

Friday night, I thought it would be logical for B-Rock to spend the night so we could be at the bar by 10:30am for this bus to the Nats game, but that's not quite how it went down. B-Rock got wasted w/his neighborhood homies, and I hit Firehouse, Hard Times, my house, smoked, and then thought it would be a great idea to go out to Icons (this local wanna be DC club) w/my ex & 2 of his friends. I blacked out....my ex  reminded me just a few days ago of some of a couple of the events that went down that nite: I took a picutre in front of Icons when we left, on my knees, in front of his boy w/my mouth to his...well, you know, his urrreaaa! (HE HAD HIS CLOTHES ON YOU PERV, but still - sometimes, that's just how it goes down lol!) Not a good look, but ya know, alcohol makes shit happen!

The next thing I know, my roomate, C-Murder (TOTALLY not her name, but we don't have a good nick name yet, and that makes me laugh for some reason - get em girl!) is calling my name while talking on the phone to someone - it's my girl CHBizzle. It's 11am. I am not on the bus to the game that left at 10:30. I have no idea what the fuck is going on. My computer is on the floor and my USB charger is on the floor, but my computer charger is no where to be found. Well, my computer doesn't turn on unless it's charging, so I wonder how my drunk ass thought I was going to charge my phone...not that it was plugged in or anything! On a bright note, I somehow took out my contacts :) That's always a bonus!

I immediately look at C-Murder & freakout - I think Father's Day jitters set in. I started crying like a little bitch. I go downstairs, plug in my phone, and call B-Rock. I don't remember what he said, but for whatever reason, it pissed me off & I hung up. Then I called Hard Times. Bus has left, but they gave me the managers cell# & I spoke to him - he said hit him up when we got there, he would meet us & give us our tickets - score! I called CHBizzle and she was an Angel & saved the day. "I'm going to my sister's in Arlington, I can totally drive you to the game!" With a dumbfounded look on my face, I look into the phone "Are you kidding me....Nats Stadium is so much further than Arlington...are you sure that's okay?" CHBizzle, being the sweetheart she is, took us there, so we could ride the bus home, drink & have a great time. You rock CHBizzle!!!!

So B-Rock & I finally make it into DC, meet up w/the Manager from the Hard Times, get our tickets & our free beer coupon :) This pleases me. We get in the Stadium, and I go straight for the beer stand. Get my aluminum Miller & we go up to the 200 sections to sit. We sit a whole 3minutes before B-Rock is ready to get up & walk around. We spent the remainder of the game chillin at the top of the 100s section at the "patio" area, getting new beers, me smoking cigs, and just walking around & cheering on our 8 in a row winning Nats - hollar!!! We find out the bus rolls out 20minutes after the game ends. So after the game, we walk to the buses looking for Hard Times. I think we found every bus, but Hard Times at first. It was ridiculous...and it was starting to get warm out - even for my ass who likes it's 95 degrees w/100% humidity! Anyway, there was some mixup w/the bus and we had to wait about 45minutes b/c it was coming from Manassas b/c they double booked. So B-Rock & I do the only sensible thing....lay out in the middle of the sidewalk, listening to music on his phone & gettin a tan man! I had my wife beater rolled up, my short shorts just chillin & callin it a day! This Father's Day weekend was turning out to be okay so far!

Finally - the bus arrived! It was a semi tipsy trip back to Hard Times. I had to pee at one point, and damn that is a bumpy bus to be using those "on the go, in tha bus" port-a-potty things. So we finally make it home & get off the bus, determined to get a beer at Hard Times.

As soon as we get to the bar, B-Rock heads for the bathroom. I'm just standing at the bar, waiting to order a beer, when I hear my name "Trish!" I turn around and there is CHBizzle w/some older woman & I am confused....CHBizzle doesn't drink - why is she at the bar at 5pm & who the hell is this woman...OMG she turns around & my jaw hits the floor as I semi yelp "MOM!" and tears just start pouring down my face. HOLY SHIT my mom is standing in front of me. I spoke to her last night & she was at home - in Florida. I couldn't even speak - for the first time in my life, I was speechless. I just walked up & gave her a huge hug.

B-Rock came out of the bathroom, we all ordered beers & listened to the story  of how my mom got to VA & what the hell was going on!!! CHBizzle & my Mom had been planning this for a month. Everyone knew - my roommates, friends, neighbor friends...it was insanity & I can't believe they pulled one over on me. The entire weekend was one surprise, after another, after another. I was thrilled, in shock & so thankful to have the best friends & family! As we paid our tabs, we discussed dinner. CHBizzle was going home to her man BDizzle, and my Mama, B-Rock & I were going out to dinner....I thought this would be interesting - boy was in for a surprise nite!

Too many Dave's....

So I was feeling a little ambitious. See an attractive guy, go out on a limb, give him my number. He calls right after I get home. All he says is, "This is Dave". So I ask, "Dave who?". He gives his last name but I'm still stumped. He finally says, "You gave me your number tonight at the bar?". "Oh! Of course, right... Sorry, I have so many Daves in my phone I just didn't put it together... and after all, I wrote my name down for you, I don't have your name written down anywhere."

I still felt bad, so I texted him after that conversation, just saying sorry for being so slow on the uptake, I was pretty tired... but I DO know who you are now! That turned into this:

Dave: Thought you were a nice gal and wanted to bring you back to my place
Me: Nah I'm at home, you can't bring me home now... I AM a nice girl. :-)
Dave: Yeah a gal I'm dtf
Me: Haha Damn Sir! Glad to hear it. Flattered. But I'm headed to bed. Maybe you'll catch me another day.
Dave: Well ok, would you have been dtf tonight?
Me: I was just having a good time with my girls....
Dave: Mhmm sure it's whatever
Me: Ok, what does that mean?
Dave: Lol kiddin this isn't my phone it's my friends and sayin u prob can't handle me lol
Me: What? Really....
Dave: I mean yea and yea my phone got effer so gettin a new one by u think u could me inside u?
Me: .....I'm going to sleep... Work in the morning.... and nothing in this conversation has been anywhere near a turn on.
Dave: What turns you on?
Me: Goodnight Dave.
Dave: Well ight night I'm messin with ya im down to put it in ya
Me: As exciting and enticing that sounds...
Dave: Maybe sometime
Me:

The end.

I thought he was a nice quiet nerdy type. Apparently my judgement was impaired.

In other news, we went to see the Wizard of Oz in one of our City parks last night... It was a ton of fun. =) I put my hair in pigtails for the occasion (channeling Dorothy) and this is how pigtails look in the morning when you sleep with them in.

Did you piss the bed.....or did I piss the bed?!?!

The first week B-Rock & I ever played Geeks Who Drink Trivia, we dressed up like geeks....we looked hilarious. We found it funny....I don't think the geeks did. But we're not geeks, we just make fun of them. This night turned into a LOT of drinking.

Now a few years back, I used to sleep walk when I got blackout drunk. But it hadn't happened in at least 2 years so whatever....it was a phase, so I thought. I don't know how late we stayed up drinking, but Thursday, I recalculated the events of Wednesday night after I woke up to this nightmare (btw, I recounted how much I drank Wed night....it was roughly 20 beers, maybe a couple more):

Thursday morning, I'm already late for work & hungover as all hell. First thing I notice is a towel on the bed underneath me & my heart stops. The bed is wet.....holy shit, I start freaking out that I peed in the bed - B had only slept over like 3 or 4 times, so needless to say, I spent the next two days FREAKING OUT.

After asking advice of a couple close people at work, and to the majority of my close friends, I accepted at some point, I was going to have to talk to B-Rock about it, otherwise, he would think this happened all of the time. Now, I did re

So Friday night, we had game night at the house (that's a whole different story!). B-Rock & I met up at Hard Times for happy hour to pre-game for game night, what a great idea! I figured if I got a few beers in me, it would be easier to discuss "pissing in the bed." Well, it didn't. I ignored the subject b/c everything was going smoothly.

We got back to the house, played lots of games, laughed our asses off & drank a shit ton more than necessary. B-Rock had to work at 7am on Saturday, so he went home that night. He left around 2:30am & I figured I was now drunk enough to have the balls to ask him about my peeing in the bed. So I called him & the coversation went something like this:

T-Boz: Hey....had fun, are you sure you're okay to drive though?
B-Rock: Yeah, I'm good, I will call you when I'm home though.
T-Boz: Okay sounds good, sooooo....okay have a good nite.

And I hung up. I felt like a jackass....so I called back & this is how it went the 2nd time around:

T: Hey, sorry to call you again, but ummmm I have something awkward I need to ask you.
B: Okay, what's up?
T: I guess there's no easy way to ask, so I'ma just ask.....Wed nite - did you piss in the bed, or did I piss in the bed??
B: (pause of silence)....what?? What are you talking about?
T: Well, when I woke up yesterday morning, there was a towel under me & the bed was soaking
B: (laughing): No one pissed the bed T, there was a lot of cum!
T: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. I've been stressing out for 2 days over cum??!!
B: (still laughing): But even if you did piss, I wouldn't care.

The conversation continued for another minute or so, but when I hung up the phone, I laughed my ass off to the roomies....CUM really - CUM. I'm 99% sure it was piss, and I probably did pee, but even if I did, he wouldn't care so hollar back!

Geeks Who Drink Trivia night

So every Wed night, we go to the local bar Hard Times, to play Geeks who Drink trivia. We aren't good at all. As a matter of fact, we totally suck, no matter how many people we have on our team. But we do have the best team name: C2H5OH - that's the chemical compound of grain alcohol - I will give the credit to B, for coming up w/the team name.

Each week, B & I pre-game at my crazy house and make dinner....we somehow think crushin a 6 pack before random ass trivia, makes us smarter...if we ever win, I will begin to believe that shit! Last nite was no different, except my mom was in town for my bday surprise visit. She had dinner w/us, but didn't pre-game. I'm pretty sure B & I drank enough for at least 5 people anyway!

Trivia was the same as usual - we lost badly. But we had at least 5 pitchers, and then switched to 22oz Miller's once we started Shuffle Board. Man did B & I whoop C & M's ass the first round. They came back round two, but you know we held it down for C2H5OH - we can win something!! So for this week, we're the shuffle board champs.

The walk home was interesting....apparently I am NOT good at getting piggy back rides. B continuously told me I needed to wrap my arms around his neck and choke him - like choke him lol. I for some reason, thought grabbing his shoulders was sufficient enough - I was 1.2 seconds away from falling off his back onto my back - it was not a good look, so I just walked...well, I stumbled a little bit.

So when we got home, first thing's first - cold beers! After that, much of the night is a blur. I recall L & C coming home at some point, and I know L stayed w/us in the living room. B passed out on the oversized chair w/me sprawled across him. That's the advantage of him passing out - I can lay across him if I wanted & he doesn't have a clue....I mean hell, we painted his toes Saturday night hot pink - that's another story though :) When the time finally came where I agreed w/myself I was too drunk for another beer, it was time to pass out. L & I spent a good 10 minutes trying to pull B off of the chair so he could lay on the couch. We were pulling, tugging, pushing - he would just partially open his eyes, smile & chuckle, then pass back out. It was amusing. Finally we resorted to L & I picking up a 210 pound, 6 foot tall man by his underarms, and pretty much dragging him to the couch. I laid down too, L tucked us in w/my leopard print blanket & from what L has told me, I mumbled something about being pissed I didn't get laid. DAMN ALCOHOL.

I woke this morning to L shaking me as I freaked out to what time it was. I looked around & didn't recognize where I was as the living room.....shit that's b/c it wasn't. I was in L's bed w/her, not on the couch w/B.....L, B & I have no idea how or when that happened. Damn I get around in my house, I really get around :)

See... what had happened was....

I rolled over this morning and found my roommate, T, in my bed. At first this did not strike me as strange, and I simply woke her up and said she had to get up because her mum would be confused. When I made my way upstairs and greeted her mother she asked how I was, and I replied that I was confused. She asked if that might have anything to do with the fact that her daughter had slept in my bed. And I said, yes, yes, that might be it.

So what happened last night? This is what I know. There was trivia, which I didn’t show up to until a little after 9pm. It was crowded, so, as I often do, I started by finding the one well-lit section of the bar, sat down, and read my book for a while until I was prepared to face the crowd again. I’d like the record to show that I actually got one question right for the team. One. And the answer was dulcimer. Of all things to know. After trivia, the shuffleboard commenced. It was a fierce battle that I only watched from the sidelines. It’s easier to steal M’s French fries from the sidelines. At some point, beer pong was discussed, and it was deemed a brilliant idea. C went to gather the supplies, and we all reconvened at the house. Apparently there were commitment issues regarding beer pong. Epic beer pong night turned into C and I playing water pong, drinking if we felt like it. I was quite proud of my performance. Thank you, Johns Hopkins basketball team; you trained me well back in 2003. After water pong, it was time to consider sleep. B had fallen asleep in the chair, so T and I were thoughtful enough to physically transition him to the couch. We also decided that he was too warm, and tried to assist him in taking off his shirt. This effort proved to be futile. After tucking B & T in on the couch, I retired to my own room.

…………

I rolled over this morning and found my roommate, T, in my bed.

There is no way of knowing how this happened. There are worse places she could have sleep-walked to though. So it’s all gravy.

NOTE: This was actually posted by LadyJ, not Trish-a-licious. I don't know how to fix that.